Humour

I only have two questions, where will they get enough glass and willI I still be able to collect rainwater?

Not sure what caused the smell, but man, it was vomitous. The ride home was just like the stench we have to walk through getting off the boat, to the power of ten

The interesting thing about cell phone towers is that more is actually better. The more towers the less area each tower has to cover. It then can be run at a lower power. More importantly your cellphone, that you carry in your pocket right next to your reproductive organs or hold up to your brain, can transmit at lower power levels. Now doesn’t that seem like a good idea. Oh, and your battery lasts longer in a good coverage area.

Fantastic to see that Auckland saved 1% power by switching lights off for Earth Hour. Goes to show that as so many Auckland houses now have Eco bulbs that the power saving was minimal. Well done Auckland!

Being a commuter I have travelled past the Litehouse every working day, twice a day.It has been complete for some time now,and I have to say, I don’t like it. It may have modern building techniques, it may be energy efficient but it is bloody ugly. I guess we are lucky there is a category for it, the same one the Toyota Prius is in.

Monday, 7 December 2009, 3:20 pm
Press Release: CAFCA

The nine finalists for the 2009 Roger Award for the Worst Transnational Corporation Operating in Aotearoa/New Zealand are (in alphabetical order): ANZ, BNZ, Infratil, Newmont, Rio Tinto Aluminium NZ, Rymans, Telecom, Transpacific and Westpac. There are two finalists for the Accomplice Award – the Business Round Table, and the Auckland City Council and its officials (as part of the nomination of Transpacific Industries). FULL STORY

In the words of Lady Bracknell (The Importance of Being Earnest) To lose one parent, Mr. Worthing, may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.

I guess I have been careless, that said, a lot has passed me by and somethings have landed.

I was listening to Mike Hosking ( a momentary lapse of reason) and he was pondering why everyone was so in to this rocket launch. Well Mike, it is a fucken rocket, you know, a rocket, no? No, I guess I shouldn’t expect a Lycra wearing, hair gel using radio announcer to appreciate a rocket. Then on the other hand, those of us who can recognise the smell of methanol, gunpowder, av gas and has had more than his or her fair share of JD’s, or Lion Red, knows their way round Western Springs blindfold, will know, IT’S A FUCKEN ROCKET MIKE …..

Meanwhile I have to laugh at the still vacant Retravision building. The retro visionary of an owner has managed to turn it into an uninviting chasm. Why he didn’t put some windows in it so you could save some electricity and see what is one of the best views on the island is well beyond me.

I got home the other day tofind  a Jehovahs’ Witness pamphlet proclaiming “would you like to know the truth” sitting on the doorstep. Funnily enough I know the truth (apart from the fact their end of world came and went years ago, hence they have well and truly passed their use by date) How could a Jehovas Witness couple abandon their own son on the side of the road in Takapuna after dragging him to a foreign country on the other side of the world. I would have dearly loved to have been here to ask them directly.

Brilliant to see the Fullers spin doctors out celebrating the Kea’s 21st  birthday, woo hoo, aren’t you really saying it is old?

The recent, hard hitting pull no punches, Gulf News interview with John Banks proved without a doubt that he has David Hays hand right up his arse.

Dear John,

There is no substance to that perpetually spouted drivel about of the cost of Waiheke waste collection under Clean Stream vs. TPI. When you are ready to release the true figures give us a call however we won’t hold our breath as we all know you are just a puppet mayor and David Hay and his C & R team really run council.

The Cynic

So Fullers have finally conceded that the Quickcat is in fact the Slow Dog and can’t do the run in the touted 35 minutes. Tell a story often enough and people will believe it. Instead of beefing up the horsepower,  or simply opening the throttle, Fullers have decided that in order for the punters meet their connecting bus and trains, wait for it,  the 7:20 will become the 7:15 from early October. Trust Fullers to be on the cutting edge of progress.

Sorry, Zero decay wasn’t immediately obvious. Thanks for the laugh anyway.